Taking the pith!

Every year I make those clove-studded oranges to hang on the tree and every year I end up with sore thumbs, so I decided to use a cocktail stick to make the hole in the peel first...what happens? I stab my finger with the stick and end up with a splinter.

And yes, I know I said I wasn't putting up a tree this year but the kids won and I gave in. Himself not pleased as his favourite chair is now at the wrong angle for viewing the TV but we all have to make sacrifices...

And it continues...

Time to clear out the kitchen cupboards in a pre-Christmas, pre-Spring clean. So far I've filled numerous bin liners with:

• 4 Tupperware containers sans lids
• Assortment of rusty metal cookware tins - why do I have 3 muffin tins?
• 3 horrid flan dishes caked with...well, let's say, greasy.
• 1 water purifier - cracked but saved in case it miraculously repairs itself
• The plastic baskets to an old veg steamer - I bought a new one last year and hoped I could fit the old baskets on it so I could steam 10lb of sprouts in one go. They didn't fit but were saved anyhow. Why? I have no idea.
• 1 plastic colander slightly melted on one side where it came into contact with a hot roasting pan
• Various odd soup bowls circa 1980
• Ditto mugs
• Ditto side plates
• Ditto egg cups (in the shape of golf balls??)
• 2 packets of broad bean seeds, 1 packet of thyme seeds and a packet of radish seeds (plant by 1998 for best results)
• Numerous plug-in air fresheners - because they might be a fire hazard, or so one national newspaper informs us. As I can't recall which make, I've thrown them all out in case they catch fire and burn my house down whilst I'm out buying mince pies in Sainsbury's.

Okay, off to the local tip with my sacks full of domestic waste. And I swore this Christmas would be stress free...Jingle-bliddy-bells, my a**e!